Growing up I always kept a journal. My first was an extremely small notepad...as in one of those 2 in x 3 in ones. Then I moved on to one of those hot pink top-secret frilly ones covered with lace- with it's very own lock and key. Eventually, as I changed in my appearance, so did my choice of journal. It all depended on my mood. Needless to say, I had a wide variety of journals over the years.
It started in '92 when my family and I moved to Liepaja, Latvia for one year. Someone briefly mentioned that I should write while I was there. I did. I wrote. EVERYTHING. I do believe I might still have that bright animal printed notepad somewhere tucked away. Maybe I'll do some digging around tomorrow. That would definitely give me something to look forward to.
Though our time in Liepaja ended, my desire for writing only grew. In a way, I was addicted. I soon found myself saddened if a day passed and I hadn't had a few minutes to scribble my thoughts. I can't express how many nights I'd spend in my room jotting things down. Whether it was about the note I got in trouble for passing in class, or if it was about what was written on that note...I felt it important enough to give the details of every second. Who I liked and why...That was a very popular subject throughout. Some of my entries were focused on my trials and tribulations at that moment. But, mind you, those "trials and tribulations" ranged anywhere from a zit on my chin to pretty severe depression. Either way, writing soon become a daily part of my routine. Writing was my therapy- my escape- my stress relief- my ME time.
I was recently home to visit my family in South Carolina when my mom handed me two of my old journals...Two questions came to mind. 1, Where in the world did Mom find these? and 2, Did she read them? I suppose if the roles were reversed, I might have been tempted to sneak a peak! Somehow I must have left those out of my "JOURNALS TO BURN" stack. I put my pajamas on, slid under my parents thick, fluffy gold embroidered comforter and read what I had written back in 2003. I prepared myself. I mostly laughed as I read the very last entry I ever wrote. Those six pages were all centered around the man that is lying next to me in bed.
That was it...my last entry...2003. I was going to meet Rex, my on-line pal. Long story short: we met, fell in love, got engaged, traveled to Australia, got married,...etc. I guess life took such a crazy turn that, in the hustle and bustle of things, my writing came to a screeching halt. I'm not even sure if I realized it... and, if I did, did I miss it?
I miss it. Now.
I didn't realize it so much until reading one of my amazing friend's blog....She inspired me.
So tonight, I'm for the first time in my life, BLOGGING. Slightly a different feel than physically writing....but it feels nice. I'm not sure how long this phase will last...if I'll become addicted once again to my writing sessions. I guess time will tell.
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